Over-due & under-pressure

I have to get this down because I am so angry!

My midwife came yesterday for a check and Akeel quite rightly brought up the subject of induction. On her last visit she said that I wouldnt be able to homebirth after 42 weeks, and made me an appointment (for tomorrow) to see the consultant to discuss induction. I had been worrying about this, furiously researching our options, getting my facts straight and made an informed choice that I dont want to be induced, and I will go ahead with a homebirth after 42 weeks.

Induction only works if you are close (ie 24 – 48 hours close) to labour anyway, and a failed induction (which means you and baby are just not ready) can cause a false labour bringing with it anxiety, stress, exhaustion and eventually a possible c-section. Even a succesful induction carries a risk of fetal distress, and even if it doesnt, it does mean constant montioring which means restricted movement in labour, harder and faster contractions, and all kinds of issues that go against everything I believe about labour and the female body and can lead to cascading interventions ie venthouse, epidural, and c-section.

Why on earth would I put my baby through that for the sake of a couple of days?

Then there is the issue of not being ‘allowed’ a homebirth after 42 weeks. This is complete and utter rubbish. There is no reason to treat a 42+ week pregnancy as wrong, or a medical problem. The average pregnancy is 38 – 42 weeks, and the EDD (Estimated Date of Delivery) of 40 weeks is just the middle point of that average. I am not overdue until I am past 42 weeks, and wont be treated as such. This 40 week or 280 day middle point is calculated on the average cycle length of 28 days. Its all just averages and estimations, and as long as baby and mother are healthy there is no reason I can think of to treat a 42+ week pregnancy as a problem.

Yes – there is a risk of the placenta beginning to fail, which means it may be less able to support the baby through contractions, resulting in a stillbirth. But this risk is very minimal and can be detected. It is not an unknown or a certianty. With fetal heart rate monitoring and checking of the amount of amniotic fluid, it is possible to monitor the health of the placenta. Why then do some midwives and doctors automatically treat over-due as life threatening and pressure mothers into induction and/or hospital births with constant monitoring?? It just seems so un-necessary, especially considering the added pressure, stress and anxiety of this can prevent labour from happening naturally!

So anyway. When we raised the issue again with the midwife yesterday and I tried to ask her about the actual risks and not just the percieved risks and to get my point across, she told me that I would be risking my babies life and that it was wrong to be stubbron for a homebirth ‘at any cost’. I have to admit I got a bit upset…she was just going on and on about the risk of a stillbirth, not letting me get a word in, and I burst into tears. She seemed to be saying she cared more about the welfare of this baby than we do, and I was just being silly and stubborn!

I ended up agreeing to daily monitoring at the hospital after 42 weeks delaying induction until 43 weeks, and going to hospital to birth after 42 weeks. I felt so beaten and guilty, so down hearted, she made me feel like I was being selfish and not putting my babies wellbeing first. In the heat of the moment she got to me and I backed down.

And today I have woken up furious!!! How dare she!

I’m only 40 + 3 and already i’m under this kind of pressure and stress? How is that healthy, supportive or helpful? How am I supposed to stay relaxed with this kind of pressure? I hope to god that she is not the attending midwife when I do give birth because I have absolutely no faith in her to adhere to my carefully researched and thought out birthplan. I dont trust her atall. I dont even like her. How dare she play the dead baby card on me just to get me to hospital! She has absolutely no respect for my beliefs and trust in my body, my baby, and my instincts.

I am NOT going to be induced. I am NOT going to give birth in hospital unneccessarily. I will agree to monitoring and if there is any evidence that the placenta is failing then this will change things obviously, but unless that happens I will continue to treat this pregnancy as healthy and normal, and fight for the birth my baby deserves. I wont be made to feel guilty by the consultant tomorrow or by this midwife again, and I wont be shut down without getting my point across.

I am mama bear hear me roar!